Let’s be real. Most flirting tips for men online don’t work. Read this article, and you’ll discover ones that do.
Men are in a bit of a pickle when it comes to getting dating advice these days. They’re often given tips and tricks that just end up scaring women away or make them lose interest. In many cases, they might even feel like they’re on their own in the dating world, simply because they can’t get any good advice.
Does it feel like you can’t seem to get any leeway in your dating life? Wondering why the advice you’re getting doesn’t work? These flirting tips will help you make the most out of your time online.
Subtle Flirting Tips For Men
Being heavy-handed with your flirting is a great way to make sure that you end up with no phone numbers and a bad reputation. If you want to see success, it’s all about being subtle and having the right mindset. These flirting tips can help:
- Remember that the girl who you’re DMing is a person. This seems so simple, but there’s such a huge mindset shift that happens when you realize that women are just single people and not sex gatekeepers. Talk to them to learn more about them before you ask for a number.
- Don’t open up with “Hey,” or a compliment about your looks. The vast majority of men do this, and this makes the approach not work. It’s shallow and doesn’t cast you in a good light.
- Go in with no expectations. Expectations ruin online dating. It’s better to think about it as meeting new people. If something happens, it happens. If not? Well, you just spent some time having fun chatting with someone who might become a friend, or a good memory. That’s what dating is all about.
- Remember that dating is not transactional. This is becoming a seriously common, yet toxic, mindset that both men and women have started to get. Just because you buy a drink doesn’t mean you’re owed a date. On a similar note, you don’t have to continue talking to a girl that cooks for you.Seeing dating gestures as a business transaction or having strings attached to everything makes both you and her disposable. You’re not disposable, nor is she. It’s about a connection, not a transaction.
- Read her dating profile. Don’t judge a book by its cover. Reading a dating profile can help you kickstart a conversation, find red flags, or also deal with finding someone who matches with you.
- Remember that you’re picking out girls, too. There’s a common belief that guys have to do a whole song and dance, just to get a girl to choose them. Guys forget that they should be screening girls, too. After all, you have needs and personal preferences. Your job is to find someone who matches that and is interested in you, too.
How To Be Great At Connecting With Women
Most tips involve charming a girl, or talking to her about yourself. That’s great and all, but you really need to remember that a conversation is a two-way street.
- Look for indicators of sexual attraction. If a girl is interested, she’ll keep engaging you in conversation. She’ll be asking you questions. She’ll laugh, make eye contact, or just get flirty with you.
- Listen more than you talk. Both men and women love to talk about themselves, so why not ask her some questions? Most girls don’t want to be talked at. They want to be talked to, and that includes having guys who are genuinely interested in what she has to say.
- Take a hint. Knowing when to back off is just as important as knowing when to pursue. If she’s not answering, showing any kind of flirting body language, or just seems uncomfortable, back away.
- Be engaged with what she’s telling you. Sure, she’s saying she loves sushi, but do you know which roll? What about if she likes the same sushi bar as you? Really get into what she’s saying, and you’ll find yourself feeling a lot better about the datng scene in general.
- Do make suggestive jokes—within reason. Suggestive jokes show that you are attracted to your date and can be a way to bond. However, it’s all about connotation. Mild jokes are ideal in most situations. If your culture doesn’t work well with dirty jokes, skip it altogether.
- Find common ground. You know how people tell you that opposites attract? Though it was a great song in the 80s, it doesn’t really hold water in real life. People who have a lot in common are far more likely to get together and stay together. So, make a point of showing her that you’re just like you.
- Don’t waste time on women who are lukewarm on you. Though it may be tempting to try to convince a girl who’s iffy on you that you’re the one she wants, it’s not a good idea. This isn’t healthy behavior and will only make you feel inadequate in the long run. Instead, go for the girl who genuinely seems excited to talk with you.
The Importance Of Being You
It’s totally normal to feel like the competition is fierce when it comes to online dating, and honestly, you wouldn’t be wrong for feeling that way. Online dating can be brutal for men! It’s very tempting to feel like you should fudge the truth when you’re typing up that profile...or maybe even photoshop your pictures.
Trust us when we say that we get it. But, do you really want to do that? This kind of behavior may give you a temporary advantage at the beginning, but it won’t actually play out in the long term. Once girls realize that you’ve lied, you stop being charismatic and start being unsettling to be around.
Lying on your profile is a short-term win for you. It breaks peoples’ trust in you, which in turn, makes it hard for them to believe you when you say the truth later on. It leaves them wondering, “Who is that guy? Was anything he said about himself really true?”
A better option is to show the best version of you—the you that you really are, cast in a great light. Be honest when you say you’re in between jobs, but mention that you’re going to school to get a new career. Be real when you say you have a few extra pounds, because it’s more of you to love!
Contrary to popular belief, most women are not looking for Mr. Perfect. They’re looking for the guy who is looking to improve himself. Girls know life isn’t perfect, so they are not going to look for someone who isn’t actually real.
If you’re out dating and just starting to get into the online world, it’s normal to feel frustrated or outnumbered. However, it’s all about being consistent with your efforts and having fun with it. Women aren’t some kind of magical gatekeeper, nor are they going to critique every move you make.
It’s far better to listen to girls, engage with them, and ignore the ones that aren’t interested. As long as you keep an upbeat, optimistic view of things, you should be able to find someone that you click with. After all, online dating isn’t supposed to be a massive trial by fire. It’s supposed to be fun, so have fun with it.